Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same.

Breakups suck, especially after a long-term relationship. The idea of living post-breakup often feels daunting and frightening. It’s not the breakup that hurts the most- it’s the post-trauma that follows it. You’re back to square one, restarting your life only to simultaneously encounter doubt, lostness, and heartaches. How does the healing begin?

The hardest aspect of breaking up, especially after a long-term relationship, is not losing the person. It’s the day you wake up realizing your feelings have changed and you now have the ability to move on.

We hold onto “letting go” because it is the last part of the heartbreak. Once that happens, reality sets in, and we are forced to begin that new chapter. It is the most painful yet transformational moment, but you have to decide: am I going to stay stuck in this cycle of grief and suffering, or am I going to accept reality for what it is and move on?

In this episode of the Really Personal Podcast, Tiffany and I engage in an honest conversation about healing after a long-term relationship. From moping in bed for hours to finding pockets of emotional relief, the path toward healing is tried and true. You can’t start the next chapter in life if you keep reading the last one.

Whether you currently going through a breakup or is seeking tools to guide you through some much-needed healing, Life Journals and Prompts and Self-Care Planners are the perfect way to jump-start your writing meditation practices, and to approach each day with intentions and gratitude. The planners include space to plan and record meals, habits, sleep, mood, water intake, exercise, and much more. With beautiful covers and pages waiting to be filled, Life Journals and Planners are a perfect tool for self-care and reflection.

How to Heal After a Breakup

#1: Focus on Yourself

You’ve been fighting for the relationship, and even exhausted every option by begging and pleading. It’s only natural to lose yourself in the process. Stop focusing on trying to win them back, and finally try to get back to you.

#2: Look Inward

Optimize the distance and time away from your ex to gain clarity about your relationship through journaling and meditating. Life Journals and Self-Care Planners are wonderful and inspirational tools to help you on this journey of healing. The clarity you will get from looking inward might help you realize the ex you presently want in your life actually has no place in your future.

#3: Set Boundaries

Let’s be real, your ex will try to come back, and if you don’t recognize your patterns of emotional triggers, you can easily fall back into the same toxic cycle that you’ve been trying to break free of. Set boundaries for yourself in order to avoid making the same mistakes. Boundaries include telling every person you come in contact with the details of the relationship and breakup. The constant reliving and rehashing will not provide the emotional space to heal. The boundaries are set to protect you.

#4: Be Kind to Yourself

We’re humans and in a state of emotional vulnerability, you may make mistakes. As a gentle reminder, be kind to yourself. Go easy on yourself, and keep moving forward. I know it’s scary to move on and heal. Find the support and care from loving friends and family, and believe the next chapter in life will be much better.

You’re not on a specific timeline to heal. Know that grief is an important teacher.

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