There is nothing more beautiful than when you prove to yourself just how strong you are.

How to Build Something of Value in a Relationship

#1: That’s what a relationship is: two people building value together.

However, your value isn’t the relationship. Your value is your value. So when someone is no longer in your life or you leave the relationship, your value remains intact. You didn’t lose any of your values when someone walked away.

#2: They were the source of my happiness.

I simply cannot say that they were the source of my happiness because these values remain with me. Now, I’ve stated that I like being in a relationship. I like sharing my life with others. I love building values with others. But I didn’t feel special, needed, desired, or loved solely because of that person.

#3: Be honest with yourself.

If in fact, you do identify with a person who left the relationship, then let that be a signal, and kickstart to identify that you have to live your life differently in how you build self-confidence, self-love, and resilience. If you are finding your value outside of yourself, you will be miserable, but most of all, you’ll be in an endless cycle of disappointments, feeling stuck, lost, unloved, and abandoned.

#4: Build your own values.

We were raised by parents, and regardless of the way we were raised, we had to search for and build our own values. At that early age, no one told us that we had to go out and build those values so what we do then is to look for validation outside of ourselves. We go looking for things exteriorly- money, a new job, a relationship, things. We spend our whole life placing that value outside of ourselves., and thus why do we become terrified when we lose things and people- if I lose my job, if I lose this person, then I lose my value because that is my value.

#5: Getting your Ex back won’t make you valuable.

For queenship and kingship, we HAVE to make the distinction that we can build values in our lives through relationships, a career, and business. But the things we create as values are not our values. Those exterior things, those things outside of ourselves are temporary- it’s simply not ours to keep.

#6: We are the only asset we have.

We are the only asset we have. Rather than focusing on building on that asset, they look outside of themselves.
We don’t want to lose the relationship so we don’t lose our values. That’s why people stay in toxic relationships even if they are being mistreated terribly. Someone mistreating you isn’t valuable- let’s be real.

Healthy Reminders After a Breakup

1. You were happy before them, and you’re going to be happy after them.
2. There was a time in your life when you didn’t even know who this person was.
3. You were the magic in the relationship.
4. The fact that you were able to be that heartbroken over somebody means that you brought all this love, care, and spark into the relationship- that’s all you!
5. It was NOT a waste of time.
6. You learned so much- what you like, what you don’t like in the future
7. Give it time. It’s OK not to be OK.
8. It’s OK to cry, wallow in bed, etc.
9. Time is the main thing that will help.
10. Queenship- you will get your sparkle back

Feeling in the slumps, dull, or that you’ll never return to your original personality are normal feelings
Trust, you’ll get that sparkle back

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